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Thursday 15 September 2016

High school poetry

Perfect

Feeding her soul through her mouth
Eyes wide open
Looking where to turn to
Unable to have peace
Because of her
Trembling fears
Of herself
The food in her hands
Her heart full of shame
Not able to be
Perfect.


No understanding

No understanding
Her mind flowing
Here and there
Fear flowing through her
In her hair
Out through her fingers
Mind totally exposed
No understanding of life
Or of anything
This earth
This girl
No understanding



Love and goddesses

Love and goddesses
Names and food
Things that bring
You and me
Closer
Honey, oysters, asparagus.
And more.
Is it food?
Or is it you?
Love
Life
Fulfillment with you
Or is it just,
Love and goddesses



Words not spoken

Putting his lips on mine
Telling me he loves me
I'm not sure
What to do
If I can say
The same words
Back to him.
Fears that rush in
Like the cool summer breeze
Just wondering if
My heart
Does it
Truly love
Him.
Will I know if I say these words
That tear my heart?
I love you
The words not spoken.



Empty inside

I'm not sure of the things to do
Places to go
Or people to see.
Uncertainty plagues my mind
Blank
Empty, is all that is there
Not able to give peace.
Blank
Empty space in to nothing.
Nothing will come of
Empty inside.



Untitled

Things that float
Things that flit
Things that I may
Just mear understand
Flit
Float


Tuesday 13 September 2016

Temple!

I got to go to the temple last Saturday. It was the most amazing thing ever. I was no nervous I felt like I was going to puke in the car with the RM who was driving me. I was just chatting away trying to get rid of my nerves.

It was amazing my experience in there. I was nervous and I had brought with me 18 family names to do baptisms for. It was great. I got to take my mothers and both my grandmothers names. It truly was amazing.

I had gone in and I had questions for Heavenly Father. The way things had been going I had loads of questions, and I needed answers.

I was sitting in the chapel after and was looking for a verse and Heavenly Father blinded my eyes to it. He made me focus on one chapter and it gave me many blessings. It was amazing.

Its been really hard to do what Heavenly Father has asked of me. Im feeling like Im dying inside and I feel so lonely. I have not felt this lonely since the week that I left my ex husband and I was in a transition shelter and I had NO ONE to talk to. Not one of my friends was there for me. I was on my own and in my own head. It was hard.

Im trying hard to talk to others and keep out there but its hard. I know Heavenly Father will bless me for following what he is asking of me. I know he has blessings out there for me.


Please also keep an eye on a new blog I am starting for Institute classes. It will be good!