Some things happened over the canada day long weekend. I was staying friends with my ex boyfriend. We got in to a big disagreement. He was not vocal the way I expected about it being time to leave to drive me and my kids home, and then a fight happened. So I told him I was sorry and to go to his canada day event and I would figure something out.
I spent the next hour in tears at the beach as my kids played with there new friends. Got to touch crabs that one of the ward members caught. Learn about paddle boarding, and just had a blast. They got soaking wet in the ocean and then dried off. They were having a fantastic time.
I ended up getting home safe. I made a new friend with a young mom who was around my age and lives up near UBC while her husband is working on his Doctorate. It was great to get to know people. The mid singles were supposed to attend along with the Vancouver family ward. There was only 3 other singles there. And they were all way older then me, and not in the mid singles age.
Well the kids had fun. We got home ok. I still am upset about the way that my conversation with my ex went. It was a fight but then he brought my parenting in to it. Telling me that I let the kids make all the rules and that I'm not the adult. I admit I'm not a super strict parent and yes my kids do get away with a lot, but Im also a single mother.
When your a single parent its hard. My kids respond better with a 2 parent household and its just so much easier. Its better when you have someone that can back you up. Someone that can help watch the two while you deal with the one that is causing trouble. Its really hard being a single mother. I never chose to be a single mother, nor did I want to be a single mom. BUT this is what happened. And I can't change it.
I got home and I went to bed. My eyes were swollen from crying. I really do still care about him. I do still love him. But after this I'm not sure what or if I want a friendship with him. I still have to figure out about my computer he has, and I have his scriptures in my car. I also came across the love letters I wrote him for our 6 month anniversary and I have the painting that I made him.
I have also started talking to a new guy, He is related to one of the sister missionaries that helped me get baptized. Lets call him D.... Well D is such a sweet guy. Im not to sure if he likes me, or if its just a friendship thing. We have had quite a few long phone calls. Talking in to the wee morning. He is super sweet, but he lives quite a ways away.
I went to the YSA in my area. Not the one I was baptized in, It was good. I admit a few people got on my nerves as they were not reverent and were joking around and not really listening and being super distracting. But I enjoyed the lesson and the discussion and the talking. There were a few really nice people there. They are doing a movie night for FHE tomorrow. Im thinking I'm going to try to go. But I need to find a ride there. Not sure if I can find a way to get out there. But Im going to try to get out and enjoy it. I plan to go to some more of the YSA activities and keep going to the family ward. I hope to make some single friends around my age.
